Granted, they didn't give me acrylics because I think I confused both nail techs that were working on us. I ended up with French manicured nails that were 100 percent natural, which is always nice cause I know the owner fairly well and she always looks less than excited when I don't do the fake nails. But at least I can do my nails for less than the standard fill and I don't have to keep coming back to get them filled. :-D
It should come as no surprise that this isn't a regular occurrence for me. I am really having to force myself to get out of my comfort zone and do nice things for myself. A lot of times I don't feel like I really matter that much. I kind of see myself as an afterthought, like I have to take care of everyone else and maybe me when I get around to it. It sucks, but I've always kind of been dictated by everyone else's opinions of me. And for the most part they have been resoundingly negative.
It is so weird though, because the more I do for myself, like cook a nice meal for myself, get my hair and nails done, buy myself a dress, etc., the more empowered I feel. I have felt empowered before in the same way that you might if you drank 16 cups of coffee, a lot of energy that is more impulsivity than actual empowerment. The less medications I was on, the less that seemed to occur.
But the more I do things for myself, the more this positive chain of events gets set in motion. Like, I got my nails done, how about I put lotion on and give myself a pedicure, and how about I cook myself a nice meal, and read my favorite book. Stuff like that. Even doing laundry is cathartic for me in a sense. Or cleaning. I consider that part of that positive change of events.
It's such a cheesy commercial, but there used to be this Nutrigrain Bar commercial that would show two possible scenarios: one woman ate an unhealthy breakfast, and caused this snowball effect: she had a donut at work, she got fast food, she ate a pint of ice cream in front of the TV at night and went to bed to do it again. For those of you that have been on the weight loss train like I have been for years, I'm sure you can relate. Then there was the second scenario; the woman saw the Nutrigrain Bar or whatever the next day, and she began drinking water, she got a salad for lunch, she ate more healthy food, and worked out before she went to bed. Both could hypothetically happen, but she decided to set a positive chain of events in motion by what seemed to be an innocuous act.
In Buddhism there is a law of cause and effect, also known as karma. It's not so much a divine mandate as it is a scenario that is similar to the above example: the choice you make at one point, say, to get your nails done and order a healthy lunch, could set in motion a positive chain of events if you allow the good karma (good choices) to accumulate. But nothing really is set in stone. You could basically choose at any moment to add to your good karma or bad karma. But whatever your choice was would show itself in some way at a later date. That is just the way karma works. :-) It is similar to the Biblical principle that you reap what you sow. There is something deeply intriguing and empowering about that. And not the 16 cups of coffee kind of empowerment.
I believe I will set the positive events in motion.
With Metta,
Shelly